Media
· Jun 9, 2026
· 31
Trump Narrowly Escapes Being Bitten By Rabid Kristen Welker
EAU CLAIRE, WI - In a frightening encounter during his trip to Wisconsin, President Donald Trump narrowly avoided being bitten by a rabid Kristen Welk...
Business
· Jun 9, 2026
Bad Sign? Big Mac Now Listed As ‘Market Price’
CHICAGO, IL - The U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics revealed on Tuesday that America may be heading into a major economic depression following the annou...
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Politics
· Jun 8, 2026
· 79
L.A. Vote Update: Spencer Pratt Now At Negative One Billion Votes
LOS ANGELES, CA - After the latest ballot drop, Los Angeles officials released an updated vote tally showing candidate Spencer Pratt was now sitting a...
Life
· Jun 8, 2026
· 59
Teen Boy Worried Hair Does Not Look Enough Like Head Of Broccoli
HOUSTON, TX - Taking stock of himself in the mirror this morning, local teenager Adrian Larson became deeply concerned that his hair does not look eno...
Worldviews
· Jun 5, 2026
· 89
Liberals Give Us Their 10 Most Convincing Arguments For Abortion
Among Americans, there remains an ever-growing divide between those who are pro-life and those who are pro-killing-their-baby. In an attempt to bridge...
Politics
· Jun 8, 2026
· 56
California Reminds Voters There Are Just 30 Days Left To Vote In Last Tuesday’s Election
LOS ANGELES, CA - California election officials reminded voters over the weekend that there are just 30 days left to mail in their vote for the Los An...
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World
· Jun 4, 2026
· 64
10 Irrefutable Proofs Russia Is Better Than The U.S.
Sociological experts and podcasters agree: Living in Russia is far superior to living in the United States. From their pristine subways and plentiful ...
U.S.
· Jun 5, 2026
· 55
Trump Repairs The Crack In The Liberty Bell
PHILADELPHIA, PA - President Donald Trump proudly announced on Friday that he had repaired the crack on the Liberty Bell, outraging millions of Americ...
Family
· May 19, 2026
· 51
Study Reveals 90% Of Data Centers Just Storing Your Wife’s Pictures Of The Kids
OVERLAND PARK, KS - The need for the construction of massive data storage centers has been in the news again recently, with the results of a new study...
Entertainment
· Jun 5, 2026
· 59
'Obsession' Director Says He Got Idea For Horror Movie Having Once Met A Woman
HOLLYWOOD, CA - Director Curry Barker has a surprise hit on his hands with his indie horror movie Obsession, which has especially connected with Gen Z...
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Premium
· May 25, 2026
· 37
It's Memorial Day: Whom Are You Honoring?
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· May 19, 2026
· 82
Farewell, Thomas Massie! Here Are 7 Of The Bee's Most Memorable Articles About Tom
As you may have heard, Thomas Massie has officially been defeated in Kentucky's GOP primary, heralding the end of his Congressional tenure. Massie has...
Premium
· May 18, 2026
· 33
Rejected Babylon Bee Photoshop #3492
Our crack team of certified fake news specialists work tirelessly every day to bring you fake news you can trust. We've shared before about how our te...
Premium
· May 5, 2026
· 47
Photo Caption Challenge Winner: Trump And The Bees Edition
Last week, we put out the challenge to our intrepid subscribers to caption this glorious photo of Trump with a bee. After sifting through the stack of...
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