Politics
· May 20, 2026
· 87
Massie Blames Defeat On Jews Of Rural Kentucky
LOUISVILLE, KY - Representative Thomas Massie has accused the Jewish population of rural Kentucky of being the cause of his primary defeat.
Life
· May 20, 2026
· 56
Gen Zer Dies Of Starvation After DoorDash Driver Gets Flat Tire
NORFOLK, VA - A member of Generation Z reportedly starved to death while waiting for a DoorDash delivery that would never come, authorities confirmed ...
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Life
· May 19, 2026
· 89
Old Guys Hanging Out At Denny's At 6 A.M. Having Better Day Than You Could Ever Dream Of
LOST HILLS, CA - New reports show the four old guys hanging out at Denny's at 6 a.m. are having a better day than you or anyone else could possibly dr...
U.S.
· May 19, 2026
· 101
White House Insists High Gas Prices Are Small Price To Pay For Accomplishing Nothing In Iran
WASHINGTON, D.C. - With the nation facing its highest gas prices in years, the Trump administration assured Americans that it is but a small price to ...
Politics
· May 20, 2026
· 39
Thomas Massie Finally Recognized As True Libertarian Now That He Doesn't Have A Job
GARRISON, KY - Congressman Thomas Massie has finally been recognized as a true libertarian after becoming unemployed.
Family
· May 20, 2026
· 45
Supreme Court To Hear Argument Between Siblings Over Who Called Shotgun
WASHINGTON, D.C. - In a groundbreaking case that legal experts predicted would set a historic precedent for generations to come, the United States Sup...
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Politics
· May 18, 2026
· 58
New Polls Show Dead Heat Between ‘Make Everything Worse’ Candidate And ‘Fix Everything’ Candidate
U.S. - New polling data in an ongoing political race showed a dead heat between the "Make Everything Worse" candidate and the "Fix Everything" candida...
World
· May 17, 2026
· 62
London Mayor Confused By Protesters Not Chanting ‘Death To Jews’
LONDON - London Mayor Sadiq Khan was deeply confused by protests over the weekend where no one was shouting "Death To Jews."
Family
· May 19, 2026
· 51
Study Reveals 90% Of Data Centers Just Storing Your Wife’s Pictures Of The Kids
OVERLAND PARK, KS - The need for the construction of massive data storage centers has been in the news again recently, with the results of a new study...
U.S.
· May 18, 2026
· 53
Data Center Built In Theodore Roosevelt's Mustache
KEYSTONE, SD - In a historic victory for American infrastructure, the Department of the Interior announced the successful installation of a 50,000-squ...
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Premium
· May 19, 2026
· 60
Farewell, Thomas Massie! Here Are 7 Of The Bee's Most Memorable Articles About Tom
As you may have heard, Thomas Massie has officially been defeated in Kentucky's GOP primary, heralding the end of his Congressional tenure. Massie has...
Premium
· May 18, 2026
· 28
Rejected Babylon Bee Photoshop #3492
Our crack team of certified fake news specialists work tirelessly every day to bring you fake news you can trust. We've shared before about how our te...
Premium
· May 5, 2026
· 47
Photo Caption Challenge Winner: Trump And The Bees Edition
Last week, we put out the challenge to our intrepid subscribers to caption this glorious photo of Trump with a bee. After sifting through the stack of...
Premium
· Apr 28, 2026
· 159
Photo Caption Challenge: Trump And The Bees
Trump created quite a scene today when he showed off the beehive from the White House South Lawn to the visiting king of England. Write your best capt...
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